Ashes to Ashes
by RaptorX5
Summary: A few days in the life of the young X5's. Ash an X5 of my own creation is killed, deals with Max's reaction. finished Chapter 6 is up 66
1. Default Chapter

Title: Ashes to Ashes  
By: Raptor  
Rating: PG-13, for angst and character death.  
Spoilers: none that I can think of. . . Maybe the Pilot (but if you've never seen the show I don't see why you would be reading Fanfic for it. . .unless you a read-a-holic.)? 

Summary: A few days in the life of the young X-5's. Ash an X-5 of my own creation is killed, deals with Max's reaction.   
Disclaimer: It's well known that Dark Angels characters do not belong to fanfic writters let alone myself, we just bring them out to play sometimes. 

Notes: This started out as a flashback in another fic I was working on but I liked it too much to let stand there alone as a small piece, so I made it longer and into it's own fic.  
Feedback: JazRaynor@aol.com ______________________________________________________________________________  


****

Zack was the first of the squad to leave the barracks and arrive at the room they called the mess hall. He stood at attention waiting for everyone else to show up, they were all supposed to be present and accounted for at 0600 hours precisely. Zack was always there at 0550 hours, as the leader her had to set an example. Normally in the mornings they were allowed cold cereals if they were hungry and were forced to consume their share of rations. The rations were mostly vitamin and amino acid supplements that were required to be ingested at least once a day, more then that after you had been experimented on. The rations weren't very tasty, but they were told that they kept them alive and healthy.

The smell wafting from the heated trays behind the row of glass, penetrated his senses line of defense and was killing him, it smelt so good! Everyone was always hungry on Sundays, or at very least they ate without being forced. Sundays were different and not one of them had been able to figure out why. Every Sunday morning they got to eat something new, something different. Today his keen senses told him it was some kind of eggs and waffles.

"Fall in. Stand at attention!"

Zack took a step forward and took a quick head count, he was proud of the line of soldiers behind of him. They had two minuets until Colonel Lydecker would be there and he was missing three of his men. Max. Jondy. Ash. Inside Zack was raging; outside he was the picture of control and composure. The perfect solider and he expected nothing less from his younger brigade. Max and Jondy ran up to the doorway hand in hand, giggling. They dropped hands as they cleared the doorway, falling into step with one another as they made their way to their places in the line up. They had one minuet and one soldier to go. They'd all get punished if Ash didn't make it there on time. 

Last night in the barracks well after lights out Max and Jondy had been the first to respond to Ash. Zack swore those two never slept, they even slept less then he did. Soon anyone who wasn't sleeping had gathered around a groaning Ash. He was store and stiff and his joints were kind of swollen up. Ben had told us all the story of the good place and Max and Jondy had sung softly until Ash fell asleep. This morning Ash had been in the bathroom before their morning run, spitting up blood. He was scared to death and dead set against going to the infirmary level of the complex. He was afraid they'd take him down to the basement and let the nomies get to him and suck out all his blood. Colonel Lydecker stood in front of the line of soldiers his eyes boring holes into the face of the clock about the children's heads. 

0600 hours, Zack knew the time without having to look at the clock. Five minuets later Ash jogged into the room and took his place in line. No one breathed or let alone moved. Zack new he was in pain, he could see it in the way Ash held himself, but pain was not an excuse for laziness or failure. If Zack was angry, Colonel Lydecker looked like he was going to explode. Colonel Lydecker stalked his way down the line of soldiers, each standing a little bit straighter as he passed.

"You're late soldier!" Colonel Lydecker barked looking down on the boy. "What is your excuse for your tardiness?"

"Sir, I have no excuse, excuses cover up weakness, sir! I had to make use of the bathroom, sir." Ash barked back his answer suppressing a grimace as a shot of pain surged through his body. Zack saw it hidden deep in Ash's eyes, though the boy's face remained an emotionless mask as he was taught, looking Colonel Lydecker right in the eye.

There was little Colonel Lydecker could do to argue with that. "See that you don't let it happen again, soldier."

"I wont sir." Ash's bit the inside of his lip, his resolve almost broken down by the pain, and Zack saw it right away. Standing at attention must have been hell on his screaming muscles. 

Zack stepped forward one step out of the line. "Permission to begin the proceedings, sir."

Colonel Lydecker turned his back on Ash, who slumped at bit standing at ease and rolling his shoulders. He sighed, a sound Colonel Lydecker would never have heard and mouthed a thanks to Zack who barely moved his head in a nod of reply. Zack had to protect his younger siblings even if it meant he would get in trouble himself. Colonel Lydecker was fuming and the ten guards in the room seemed to take no notice.

"Did I give you permission to speak, soldier?" Colonel Lydecker yelled leaning down to get right into Zack's face.

"Sir, no sir." Zack stood at full attention expecting to feel a swift and reprimanding blow.

Ben who was standing next to Zack squirmed, not anything noticeable to the normal human eye, it was more of a change in the air current around himself that Zack felt. Ben never even relaxed his tensed muscles, but his stomach let out the fierce growl of a hungry soldier. Next to Ben, Zane and Krit allowed slight grins to form on their faces, after all they were only five and eight-year-olds and it was funny.

"Hungry, soldier?" Colonel Lydecker actually allowed himself to smile.

"Sir, yes sir. It's the smell, sir." Zack answered his superior officer.

"Permission granted, soldier." Colonel Lydecker gave Zack a curt nod of his head.

"Fall in precession." Zack commanded at the top of his voice, stepping back to allow his squad to pass him by one by one. He always let them eat before him on the off chance that there was not enough food to go around. Colonel Lydecker had done that on last Sunday and as a result Zack, Brin, and Zane had chosen not to eat. Max had offered not to eat as well, but she was always so small and had been experimented on twice that week. Zack actually had to order her to eat she need all of her strength to recuperate even if she wasn't hungry. 

Starting with Ben they each grabbed a tray, filling past Zack take their place at the table. It was proper procedure that Zack brought them all their food after they asked his permission to be seated. They all sat in two neat rows of nine neatly shaved heads on either side of the table, with proper posture, back straight, feet flat on the floor, unused hand in lap, and elbows off the table. Zack sat at the head of the table and Max at the far end opposite him. Once all their trays were squared off Zack looked up. On either side of Max were Jondy and Krit, Brin was to Zack's right and Zane to his left. Zack caught Brin shoot a glare at Max, they spent alternating days at the head of the table or at his right-hand position. It seemed Brin never forgot their constant competition for second in command. Zack took his knife in his right fist and banged the handle of it against the tabletop. Nineteen others repeated the motion in sync. They all began to cut their food, Max speeding through the task and looking up to watch the others. 

When Max saw the last of them were done she repeated Zack's motion banging her knife against the table. The rest of them and a curt nod from Zack echoed it. Silently and under Commander Lydecker's watchful eye they all began to eat. In formation, bringing the food, with the use of utensils, to the mouth, not the mouth to the food. Forks lifted in sync vertical to mouth level and then horizontally to the mouth and then followed the same 90-degree angle back down to the plate. Colonel Lydecker clasped Zack on the shoulder halting all of there eating.

"Good job soldier," He said softly for only Zack to hear. They had become more disciplined in the short amount of time Colonel Lydecker had been away. Then loudly for the whole group to hear, "Cary on, report to classes at 0700."

"Sir, yes sir." They stopped eating to salute him as he left to go to his office to indulge in his meal in private. 

They kept in check until the door slammed shut behind him.

"At ease." Zack allowed himself a half smiled ordering them to relax. 

Max turned to Jondy and quickly told her friend something around a mouth full of eggs. Jondy laughed milk threatening to come spurting out of her nose. A near by guard relaxed also a smile creeping on to his face happy to see the children acting like the kids they were. Zack smirked and shook his head; those two were always too close. Brin scowled at her younger sisters they were annoying at times and never careful when Colonel Lydecker wasn't watching them. One day it would get them into trouble. Eva who was sitting next to Jondy joined in laughing at Max's joke. Brin turned up her nose, it probably wasn't a good one anyway, and she turned to Sly and started her own conversation. Krit the youngest of the boys signaled to Zack, using hand signals and asking if he could have more, the pecan waffles were so good, this way the personnel in the room could not catch him in a moment of weakness. Zack nodded and singled him to ask the highest-ranking guard in the room if it was all right. Krit did as he was told and with permission went up to the food line followed by a few others. 

Ben was still hungry but he stayed seated speaking softly to Ash who was complaining of pain in his gums. He'd only eaten about half of his waffle and a few mouthfuls of eggs, regardless of how good the food looked, smelled and tasted he just wasn't hungry. Ash was telling Ben how his sore muscles ached and showing him his swollen joints. The others had returned to the table when Ash stopped speaking mid sentence. Four, minuets and a little more time passed before Ash gasped. Ash shot up from his seat overturning it and eyes bulging fell to the floor hands flying up to his neck. Trying, struggling, gasping for breath that he could not get. 

Everyone froze silence falling over the cafeteria. No one moved out of pure shock. X5's did not go down that easy usually you couldn't get them to drop unless drugs were involved. The guards swarmed all speaking into their radios at once only on different frequencies, moving in around Ash. Max flew up from her seat as well overturning it and went to Ash's side. She had just started individual, experimental medical training where she was taught CPR and certain things to be a field medic. If she did well then the others would eventually follow in the training so that they could help themselves out in the field. She fell to her knees at his side and worked desperately, throwing one of the guards out of his way. Zack along with the others who had no idea about her additional training gapped at her as the five-year-old flew into action. 

When the medics finally showed up after what seemed like forever, they had to move Max bodily and by force away from Ash. Her efforts producing no reaction in the boy the medics tried to revive him. They finally gave up and took Ash away on a stretcher, standing there watching Max broke down and cried. Zack moved to stand next to her, his presence a source of comfort or so he thought until Colonel Lydecker stormed through the door minuets latter. Max snapped to attention the second Colonel Lydecker stormed through the door, her tears stopping as she bit her bottom lip. Zack was very proud of her control over her emotions. Colonel Lydecker was anything but as he stalked across the room and stood before her.

"Tears soldier?" He glared down at her.

"Sir, no sir." Max's voice cracked betraying her.

"What is your excuse soldier?" Colonel Lydecker barked the question at her.

Max stood up a little straighter. "Sir, I worked on him hard, sir. I tried. . ."

"And you failed. There is no try, only do, soldier."

"Yes sir, but I did sir. I worked on him but it didn't work." Balled up at her sides Max's hands shook ever so slightly, something that only Zack at his close range to her could detect. 

"You failed." Colonel Lydecker barked getting right down in the young girl's face his own red with anger. "We'll intensify your training. For now X-5542 report to my office, the rest of you off to class, NOW."

They all jumped to follow their orders clearing out of the mess hall marching in single file past Max. Each saluted Colonel Lydecker as they past, Zack even shot a glance at Max that could only be interpreted as some for of guilt registering in his eyes. 


	2. Chapter 2

****

When Zack returned to the barracks after dinner it was dark, none of them had seen Max all day and at first he didn't see his younger sister there either. Then he saw her huddled in the far corner of the room next to her cot. A small bundle of grey wrapped up in one of the Manticore gowns. 

"Lights out, everyone into bed." Zack barked out the order.

"What about Max?" Jondy spoke up.

"I'll take care of her." Zack answered. "I said get into bed soldier!"

"But I'm not tired!" Jondy argued she had a little of Max's tenacity.

"You never are. I didn't say you had to sleep. Lay down, that's an order you shouldn't challenge." Zack growled he was standing mere inches from her face. "All of you!" He turned his voice ringing out clear in the quiet room. 

Jondy's body tensed. "I want to see Max."

"She'll be fine." Zack answered her softly hearing the door lock click shut for the night. "I'll make sure of it Jondy."

Jondy nodded and dutifully climbed into bed. "Ben tell us a story?"

Zack strode purposefully over to Max's bed and sat down near the headboard being positioned almost directly above her. "Maxie?"

Ben began softly to tell the others the story of the good place telling them how Ash was there now and that he was safe and no one could yell at him anymore.

Max sat hunched over facing the corner of the room. Her back was to Zack, her small rounded shoulders jerking up and down in a rhythmic motion. Zack was almost certain that Max was crying, but the hallow yet steady voice that answered him proved him wrong. 

"I failed him," she croaked out softly just as Zack was about to lay a hand on her shoulder, a hand he quickly withdrew.

"How many classes did you have?" Zack asked.

"Three," Max answered softly her shoulders still shaking, "not that it matters. . ."

"Then it can't possibly be you fault Max." He said softly.

"It is! I should have been ready! I shouldn't have-" Max insisted.

"No Max there was nothing you could have done, I talked to Colonel Lydecker. Ash had a genetic defect; he was allergic to the nuts in the waffles. Zack reached out and spun her around to look at him so that she would see in his eyes that it was the truth. 

"No one knew-" Zack trailed off when he saw her. 

Red rimmed, guilt ridden, dark brown eyes met with his own compassionate blue ones. That wasn't what had stopped him, but it was what he saw next. In Max's hand was an ordinary pushpin from one of the bulletin boards in the cafeteria, in the other a balled up, well used tissue. Zack had spun her so fast that she didn't have time to stop. Doubled over on her knees she was busily poking the pin into her wrist- neatly, rhythmically, precisely, and disciplined, watching tiny drops of blood form from each hole she made. She didn't flinch. She didn't say "Ouch!" or anything. The look on her face never changed from the mixture or self-hatred and guilt hidden under that perfect Manticore mask. Max just huddled there stabbing and whipping away the blood with a tissue, stabbing and staunching like a robot. For one horrifying moment Zack was powerless to do anything. The wrist of the hand that held the pin was already covered in hundreds of little red dots. Zack did the only thing he could and smacked her hand hard, the sound echoing over the lull of Ben's voice and sending the pin scattering out across the floor and spinning away from her. 

Max gasped up at him as if coming out of a trance. "I made Ash die. . ."

"No," Zack was on the floor next to her his hands grabbing her by the wrists, now her small face crumbled. The others craned their necks to see what was going on from the vantage points of their beds. In the bed right across from her Brin had the best view. 

Zack wrapped his arms around her in a hug, more to hold her still and keep her from hurting herself then to comfort her. He ripped strips of material off of the end of her sheet and careful wrapped up her wrists, still holding her. If any of the officers got one look at it they'd send her down to the physiologists ward and possibly give her shocks. There was always the threat of something being seriously wrong with her and them chaining her up in the basement with the nomies. It was a good thing both their gowns and fatigues had long sleeves. 

"Max, why?" Zack shook his head.

"Zack," she started to answer him, "I," she hung her head, "I just don't know. I failed him, I failed all of you, I. . ." She was going to say she'd killed Ash, but she was crying again and couldn't continue. Max had failed at missions before once or twice, but it had never cost her anything and certainly not anybody. Her hands twitched ever so slightly and she was sure she'd end up in the basement with the nomies. 

Zack held her close, stiffly as to not show his true feelings, which would be interpreted as a weakness by the others. None the less he was very worried about Max. 

"Max," Zack said softly, "you need to rest, lets get you into bed."

The five-year-old girl resisted the eight-year-old boy, verbally and bodily. Zack gave up and scooped Max up off the floor and deposited her on her cot. This time Max didn't fight and he could tell by the dead weight of her small body that they had her drugged up on something. Max curled up in a ball on her side her eyes hallow and empty. Her nervous system was shot her twitching hands were a personification of this. Max whimpered softly turning so that her back was to the rest of the company. She was showing the strength of the weakening effect this event had on her and she was ashamed by it.

"Maxie," Zack sat down on the foot of her cot and Max squirmed back to bring herself closer to him. "it's okay. It wasn't your fault. no one thinks it is. No one blames you."

Curt, simple, guarded, Zack's emotions were rapped up in the Manticore military fashion. Emotions we weakness, weakness was intolerable in a soldier. Still he had to look out for his agonizing little sister. He had to keep her safe from the physiologists and the nomies, but most of all herself. 

"Colonel Lydecker does and Ash would." Max's voice was a hallow echo of her true self. 

"No, that's not true. Colonel Lydecker's just using it against you to make you want to train harder in the medical class." Zack new the way the old man's mind worked. "Ash wouldn't blame you, you tried to help him where no one else could." Zack surprised himself by moving from the foot of the bed and crawling up besides her wrapping himself around her to comfort her. "He loved you, you were his little sister."

Max's whimpering grew louder with Zack's words, but quieted somewhat the moment she scooted backwards to bring her body to meet his and held the hand he had draped over her side. "Ash blames me! He said so . . . Colonel Lydecker yelled at me and Ash yelled at me and. . ." Max was crying again. 

Zack new then exactly what had happened. Colonel Lydecker must have spent the day conditioning Max in one of the empty classrooms. Her eyes held open wide so that there was no way she could turn away she would have been forced to watch a movie that she would come to believe as the truth. Once someone was conditioned into believing something, it was useless to try and convince them of anything else. Zack new it was useless, but he had to try for Max's sake. Softly but firmly he told her again what had really happened during lunch that day.

Max eventually quieted down safe and comfortable in Zack's arms listening to him tell her stories over the sound of Ben's story. Stupid tales of how Ash died, it not being her fault, and how she tried to save him. She'd never known Zack was a good story teller. She'd never known him to lie before either and it made her angry. Sleep won out over anger, guilt and pain as she listened to the polished monotone tone of his voice. It was good to know that someone cared that she was hurt, upset and scared about Ash's death by her own hand. Max had seen the video Colonel Lydecker had of herself snapping and strangling Ash. It played over and over again from the four different camera angles of the surveillance equipment in the mess hall. She saw it all again as her eyes started to drift close, the rage on her own face as she had jumped Ash who was just going up to get more food. Her own strong hands clasping around his neck and beating on his chest. Zack was telling her a made up tale intended to make her feel better but it wasn't. When Max finally fell asleep because her body needed rest and she wasn't really tired, it was the sound of Zack's voice, the pain in her arms, and the warmth of his close body that lulled her off to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: credit must be given were credit is due; the whole scene with Max and the pin (in the last chapter) needs to be credited to John Neufeld for his inspiration of a scene that stuck in my head forever. 

AN: Yes I know Colonel Lydecker is being hard on the kids, but then again I don't think he was ever easy on them no matter how much he cared for them, final episode included. Also I am well aware that in the part which follows this one, Zack is a little too rough on Brin, but I think that he would act like this for two reasons: He'd always defend the family at any cost and at this point in his life Zack was aspiring to be a clone of Lydecker himself. 

_____________________________________________________________________________

****

Zack watched from his place next to his own cot as Max snapped to attention at exactly 0500 hours and quickly made her bed then stood at attention next to it waiting for the morning inspection. She stood at attention only with her arms behind her back to hide the bandages. Jondy signaled to everyone that the inspector was coming down the hallway. Zack's gaze snapped to the door the guard who walked in had never done the morning inspections before so he knew he could get away with it for now. Zack turned to all of them and bit off a command that might help protect Max.

"At ease." He barked. They all moved in unison into a position where their arms were clasped behind their backs their feet exactly one step apart from each other. 

The unknown guard took a head count and then began to inspect all of the cots starting with Max's. "X-5452 what happened to your sheets?"

Max had no idea how to answer the man so she kept silent. Her siblings stepped in to save her.

"It happened to mine too, sir." Ben spoke up stepping forward.

"My sheets are also shredded, sir." Brin added reluctantly.

"We think it's a mouse, sir." Jondy spoke up.

Zack suppressed a grin, he never aloud himself the luxury, but he was very proud of them for sticking up for Max. Though from her reaction Zack could tell Brin was not involved in the deceiving of the officer by her own choice. 

"We think it's nesting in the corner, sir." Ben explained pointing to the corner of the room closest to Max's cot.

The guard went and inspected X-5493 and X-5734's sheets which were actually shredded. Zack could see the strips now; they were stuffed into a hole one of them had no doubt kicked into the base of the wall. When he bent down to inspect the hole that's when Zane who was good with animals as well as impersonating them went to work. When to guard was close to the hole with his back to the children Zane squealed sounding exactly like a mouse and causing the man to jump. 

"I'll report this." The guard stammered not wanting to let the children see his irrational fear. "You're cleared, report to the showers."

"Sir yes, sir!" They filled out of the room Jondy and Krit held back and fell in behind Max making sure to keep her bandages out of sight. 

They showered quickly, in the allotted time. Zack looked down at the sudsy water running past his feet and noticed the rusty color of it, and was forced to remember Max's self-inflicted wounds. He was glad he had left the bandages by the sink where they wouldn't get wet, he'd definitely have to use them again. After they were dried off Zack wrapped up Max's wrists again pulling the sleeves of her fatigues down over the bandages and making sure the snaps held tight. In neat lines of two by two they hurried into the mess hall where they were given their share of rations, on busy days like today there was time for nothing else. 

They were whisked away into one of the classrooms, which would become the briefing room for their exercise today. It was nothing new. They were going to be split into two teams and sent out into the forest. Zack and Max were to lead team one, Brin and Zane were in charge of team two. Two equal teams of ten. It was a challenge, no more then an elaborated game of capture the flag in reality. Team two was given a folder containing highly classified documents, which were actually no more then the rules of the game for the following day, which they were to hide and protect at all costs from team one. Team one's only objective was to capture the documents and return to base when they were sure the enemy was no longer a threat. Team two was given a head start, half an hour to hide the folder and devise a plan of defense. Half an hour that also gave Zack time to perfect his plan of attack. 

Zack split the group into pairs and favored Max as his partner throughout the duration of the exercise, only to serve as her protector. He knew that in her current mental state she was, for the first time in their coexistence, she was a liability to him and not an asset. Max was venerable, both in her mindset and the injury to her arms. Out of the corner of his eye Zack saw one of the rubber bullets zooming towards one of Max's injured arms, he jumped into it's path without a moments thought taking it full on in the chest.

"Hit." Zack laid out on the ground simply playing dead as were the rules of the game. 

Brin froze it had come down to Zane, Zack, Max and herself, which was not surprising. It always came down to the final four. Then there was Jondy, Max's shadow who had fallen just before Zack. Max had the plans now and Brin and Zane needed to get them back. Zack never went down in any of the field exercises and Brin and Zane stood in shock for a moment. Max noticed this and used it to her advantage and squeezed off two shots in rapid succession, one hitting Zane in the leg, the second in his chest as he moved to protect Brin. 

"Hit." Zane dropped to the ground and closed his eyes playing dead. 

Brin snapped out of her shock and brought up her gun leveling it so that Max was in her sights. Caught in a stalemate it was all a matter of who would pull the trigger first. Neither flinched or barely breathed until in a sudden burst of speed Brin pounced on Max. Brin saw for the first time that since Zack was out of the game she had a true chance at victory. Max squeezed off another shot that barely missed Brin's head and only served to increase the intensity at which Brin fought. Surging pain was all that registered in Max's mind as she feigned off Brin's attack. Brin had grabbed Max by her wrists pulling her to the ground. Pain was irrelevant and shouldn't interfere with the mission. Strength came from pain. The lessons screaming through Max's head weren't true this time. They rolled around until Brin gained the upper hand. **Brin stood up pinning Max's wrists together with one hand, a booted foot on Max's chest to keep her still, the gun trained at Max's face. **

"On you feet prisoner, surrender the plans." Brin commanded Max, leaning down over her knee to put pressure on Max's chest before she let her up.

Max struggled, but the pain got the best of her as she climbed to her feet. Brin seized the folder from under Max's shirt and held it up in the fading light of dusk.

"I win." Brin breathed out the words barely believing them herself. Sure she had won exercises before but it was always when she was on Zack's team. She'd never triumphed over the combined force of Max, Jondy and Zack. 

Colonel Lydecker who had been monitoring the progress of the exercise appeared in front of the two soldiers. He noted both the brief look of pride on Brin's face and the brief look of pain on Max's face before the two snapped to attention. Brin turned and swiped Max's feet out from under her. "I didn't say you could get up." Brin trained her gun on Max again.

"You've been compromised soldier, a worthy defeat. Left alive to be used for information, a prisoner of war. This exercise is over." Colonel Lydecker scolded Max then reached down to help the defeated soldier to her feet. He clasped his hand around her wrist, the child grasping his wrist in the same manner to pull herself up. Despite herself Max winched. 

When Colonel Lydecker had declared that the exercise was over all of the fallen that all played dead came back to life and gathered around their two commanding officers to be debriefed.

Colonel Lydecker was concerned with more then the customary debriefing. He was worried that his best soldier had sacrificed himself for the squirming on he know held. This was a weakness taken to the highest extreme, emotion personified, Zack should not care for his sibling that much. He was tormented by the look of pain in Max's eyes, the eyes he had loved so much in his wife. What bothered him more was that she had seemingly given up on the exercise all together and for no viable reason.

Colonel Lydecker grabbed Max by the end of her fatigue sleeves, holing her in position on her feet in front of him. He held her arms out straight in front of her and pulled downward ripping open the snaps at the end of her sleeves, revealing the bandages Zack had hidden there. Colonel Lydecker stared down at them for a moment before he ripped them off as well, rather unceremoniously. His eyes widened and then darkened as he looked at the injuries hidden beneath them. He grabbed Max's wrists forcefully and then shook her hard. "X-5452, what the hell is this?"

"Sir nothing, sir." Max winched, less then a winch it was simply a twitch at the corners of her mouth. The others looked on horrified and confused all growing very tense. 

"Nothing," Colonel Lydecker spat out in contempt. "I think not. Explaine your actions soldier."

Max looked up defiantly into Colonel Lydecker's eyes, she didn't know why she'd done it, just that it had felt right at the time. "It was a moment of weakness, sir."

"I don't think it was. . ." Colonel Lydecker shook his head. "And if it was, two such moments in the same amount of days is just too much. I'm taking you in for observation."

Zack moved to rush forward but Zane grabbed his arm to stop him and swiftly shook his head. Zane would fight his own brother before he would let him challenge Colonel Lydecker. Zack stopped and stood his ground next to his brother, he refused to see any harm come to Max. Out of the corner of his eye Zack caught the beginnings of a smug smirk tugging at the corners of Brin's mouth. In her head her competition for second in command would be out of the way. Brin still believed that SIC was her birth right just as being CO was Zack's. Jondy saw the look too and her reserve broke down, she lost all control. 

"You're happy about this! You probably did it on purpose you jerk!" Jondy hissed and pounced on Brin. Having the element of surprise on her side, Jondy brought the elder girl swiftly down to the ground. Jondy let loose with all she had, pummeling a stunned Brin who tried to refute her accusations. Jondy had busted Brin's nose; blood pouring down the startled girl's face before Zack and Zane pulled the two apart. Colonel Lydecker held Max by one wrist with one hand his other one held a tazer trained on where the two had been fighting.

"That's enough, back to the barracks now, all of you." Colonel Lydecker barked his warning.

"Sir, yes sir." Everyone moved off with the exception of Zane, Zack, Brin and Jondy. Jondy tried to tare away from Zack to get after Brin again. Zack held her tightly while Zane led Brin back to the compound. 

"She'll be okay Jondy." Zack held her at bay by her shoulders. "I promise." Then softly so that only she could hear him, he made her another promise. "I'll take care of Brin myself."

Jondy nodded and pulled away from Zack. She stood straight and still, breathing hard as she watched Colonel Lydecker use the tazer to take Max down. Without a backward glance Colonel Lydecker slung Max over his shoulder and carried her off to the compound to take her to the psychologists. Zack touched Jondy's shoulder and the girl jumped falling into step with him, confident and calm knowing that her big brother was once again in control of the situation. ______________________________________________________________________________

AN: More to come. :-)


	4. Chapter 4

****

Zack began his punishment of Brin in the class they had scheduled to follow the exercise. Punishment she deserved for turning traitor on one of her siblings. He behavior was simply unacceptable. A soldier should always put the welfare of the company before their own. The needs of the many outweighed the needs of the few, it was a lesson Colonel Lydecker had taught them many times by forcing them to leave or terminate a soldier who was slowing them down. Max had not fit the criteria of needing to be surrendered, her injuries would have had no effect on the outcome of the exercise and Brin could have easily been victorious without compromising her. 

Zack cornered Brin next to his assigned seat as she passed him heading to her own. The General who was going to teach the tactics class had not sown up yet. Punctuality was key to anything succeeding, Colonel Lydecker had just proven that lesson days before when he had become enraged at Ash. In Zack's eyes the General was a disgrace, a failure, this class would simply be a waste of their valuable time. He grabbed Brin's wrist forcefully as she passed.

"No matter what the cost you never compromise a fellow soldier to further your own goals. There is no I in team, soldier. You could have succeeded in the exercise without revealing Max's injury. Above all else never compromise the family." Zack growled reprimanding her, this was a lesson the others would serve well to take notice of and never repeat. Hand signals would have done the job fine, but spoken orders aloud the others to hear him as well as instilling fear in her. "Now stand at attention."

Brin snapped to attention next to Zack's desk. "X-5559, I-" 

Zack's head snapped around and he glared at her.

Brin tried again. "Zack," she swallowed. "Sir, permission to expl-"

Zack glared at her, hand signals would work just fine here. Brin would be kept in his own, less severe form of the isolation chambers Colonel Lydecker had the nomies in, and occasionally used to reprimand an out of line soldier. A quick series of gestures cut Brin off mid word. Zack pointed to Brin, shook his head, gestured to his own mouth and eyes, then held his hand out straight palm down and made a quick fist. A string of silent orders; Don't speak, close your eyes and don't move. 

Zack sat still as a stone in the desk next to her making sure she'd abide by his order for the duration of the class, eventually he'd give her the word to walk before him following the others into the mess hall for dinner. Four hours was a long time to stand muscles tense and eyes clenched shut, but Brin obeyed Zack's order. She'd only begin to feel the pain when it was requested of her that she move. 

The General entered the classroom mere moments after X-5734 had snapped to attention her eyes clenched shut and was greeted by a salute from the others. The next thing he noticed was the two empty desks, X-5236 had lost his life and X-5542 was under observation. Their absences seemed a stark reminder of how invaluable and yet at the same time expendable these soldiers were. All of Mantic ore's personal were told never to question and order issued by X-5559 because they believed that it might have undermined the soldiers position of command. So the General ignored the standing soldier, assuming she was being punished by her CO for some wrongdoing and therefore he was to enforce and strengthen the punishment as well. 

_____________________________________________________________________________________

AN: Okay I figured I'd post this just to post something. Originally this section was longer, and you'll still get to read it, but I didn't want to keep anyone waiting. I am in the middle of finals for my summer class but come this Thursday I'll be back to posting again, hopefully sooner. Whenever my final term paper gets finished, there is alot more left to come I simply need the time to type it all out. 


	5. Chapter 5

****

Max woke up from the tazer blast strapped down to a chair aware of Colonel Lydecker's presence somewhere behind her. Her bleary eyes focused in on sitting at a desk in front of her whom she'd never seen before. A woman who asked too many questions and made it obvious to Max that she believed the lies Zack had told her to be the truth. They all seemed to cling to the story to try and ease Max of some of her guilt; it was a useless pursuit. A senseless waist of time. Max didn't want to feel better about it; She'd killed her own brother with her bare hands! She didn't want it to be swept under some rug. She needed to find out why she had snapped and killed him so that she didn't hurt any of her other siblings. She was a trained killing machine with a defective trigger, she was meant to kill the enemy, not her family. This was the last thing she needed to happen and she explained this to the woman sitting before her. 

"That's not what happened, soldier." The blond haired woman tried explaining it all again. 

"She's delirious with guilt." Colonel Lydecker supplied Dr. Renfro with a viable excuse. 

"I killed him!" Max insisted. "I let Ash die."

Dr. Renfro tried reasoning with her again, if she could pull off cracking and putting this X-5 back together she'd be sure to get that promotion she had been looking for since her horrible work with the X-2's. Colonel Lydecker had an all-together different agenda in mind. He wanted to break X-5542, he wanted to see her raw emotions, get her at her weakest moment. He needed to know if she could withstand the shocks that X-5599 could handle at her age. X-5656 had been their second choice for SIC, but she couldn't take the torture and when it came down to it you needed a strong command. X-5734 had been his original choice but they had found a defective gene in her and she was undergoing testing for it, she was malfunctioning. So X-5542 was the next choice she would be molded into the perfect soldier. X-5599's female counterpart. 

It was dinnertime and everyone was extremely somber given Ash and Max's absences. They had already lost Jack and it just wasn't very good for moral to loose a fellow soldier. They feared loosing Maxie as well. They ate in silence in formal regulation style that was only reserved for when Colonel Lydecker was watching them, out of respect for their fallen comrade. Zack continued to reprimand Brin, it wasn't really her fault but Zack needed to take his aggression out on something. Brin had been a catalyst in the whole process and Max would still be with them now if it weren't for her stubbornness. Besides having Brin stand during the duration of their allotted mealtime, Zack ordered her to save half of her rations for Max when she returned. Zack did the same for her out of a sense of duty and knowing that she would need it to heal. Jondy took it upon herself to save half of her rations for her sister out of love without even consulting Zack.

Brin was hungry, stiff and angry she just knew that if the tables were turned Zack would not be reprimanding Max, or at least not come down so hard on her. Zack tried to come off as an impartial CO but the other knew he favored their youngest sister and brother. Most of the others did too. It made Brin angry the more and more she thought about it. Max was the baby; Brin deserved to be at Zack's side that was her place. If being CO was his birthright then SIC should have been her position. Max was Brin's enemy; Tinga was Brin's competition. At very least Max was her competition in everything. The others seemed to think little Maxie was special. She was in a way. She never slept. She was over emotional. She had more vices and faults then any of the others. She was a loose cannon. In Brin's eyes Max would never be fit to be SIC. Colonel Lydecker and Zack seemed to think differently. Brin hated Zack for being so hard on her right now. Her muscles ached and the rations in her fatigue pockets were making her leg itch.

Zack watched Brin standing at attention across the table from him, a stone hard glare in her eyes sullenly eating her rations. Resentment was something he saw flickering through her eyes and it hurt Zack. He didn't want to be the bad guy he just wanted to promote unity in the ranks. Zack might have been too hard on her and he didn't want to turn into the old man. He was eight years old with the mindset and eyes of a stern thirty-year-old or older soldier. 

"At ease X-5734." Zack growled.

Brin decided to ignore the order, stay strong and take the punishment that was dealt to her. She didn't want to be weak like Max. 

Zack stood up. "Sit down Brin."

Was this guilt? Zack had lost two good soldiers and Max was out of commission for now. He didn't want to loose Brin at the same time. Brin was loyalty personified and Zack didn't want her to turn against him. Brin sat down releasing an audible sigh, shook out her stiff limbs and cracked her neck. She offered Zack a curt nod and saluted him as a form of thanks. Zack returned the nod, he'd have to have a stern talk with her later.

Max became unruly she ripped free of the bonds that held her down to the chair and stalked around the woman's office. Colonel Lydecker watched the whole thing with a look of bemusement on his face his hand on the tazer at all times. Max even went so far as to overturn the woman's desk. Why wouldn't they help her? Why couldn't they acknowledge the fact that she'd snapped and killed her brother and maybe she wasn't really a perfect soldier? Why weren't they trying to help her see why she'd done it and trying to fix her? Did they want to see her kill again?

"I need to know what happened." Max broke the silence in the room.

"You tried to save Ash's life," The woman told her for the hundredth time. "You failed and your training will be intensified to insure this never happens again."

"You're lying to me." Max smelt fear on the woman and only pure enjoyment on Colonel Lydecker. "I don't want to kill again. Death is only acceptable for the enemy and my family is not the enemy."

Max heard Colonel Lydecker chortle behind her and she knew there was a smug smirk on the old man's face but she dared not turn to look at him.

"X-5542 you don't have a family. You have a regiment of comrades." The woman explained.

"I have a name and a family who I'm supposed to protect and be loyal to and fight side by side with not against!" Max had it. She broke down crying again and ripped all the books off of the near by bookshelf. "I failed everyone! I'm broken. FIX ME!" She started hitting the wall behind the bookcase.

Colonel Lydecker was on his feet in an instant trying to restrain Max. "Stand down, soldier."

It was a though Max didn't hear him. She kept lashing out harder and faster until her knuckles bled and the wall was littered with dozens of small holes. She turned on Colonel Lydecker then finally acknowledging his presence as he tried to stop her. He was no match for the young X-5's strength. All the while Renfro was watching this in fascination while trying to talk the soldier down. 

"You let me kill him! You made me kill him!" Max lashed out at the older man bloodying his nose and splitting his lip, throwing any insult she could find at him, tears streaming down her face.

Colonel Lydecker grabbed her by one of her wrists and Max howled. The needle that pierced her skin seemed to have materialized out of thin air. Colonel Lydecker stepped back releasing his hold on her. Everything moved in slow motion for Max. She managed to land three more blows to Colonel Lydecker before she collapsed to her knees.

"Help." She pleaded her voice wispy and thin before the room cascaded into darkness. 

Dr. Renfro finally moved to her feet from where she had been seated when the girl had overturned her desk. "You okay Deck?"

"Fine." He whipped some blood off his face but he was smiling. "She is a good soldier."

"I've never seen any of them go down that fast. What the hell did you give her?"

"Three hundred milligrams of Thorazine." 

"Damn that's almost enough to take down a wild horse."

Colonel Lydecker simply nodded. "That's why it works. We just can't use it too often out of fear that they'll build up a tolerance to it."

"I'll get a team to prep her for the shock treatment."

"I want to be there." Colonel Lydecker insisted un-able to get the look that had been in Max's eyes the moment she'd fallen off of his own mind.

"Consider it done." The doctor walked out of the room leaving Lydecker alone to watch over the soldier until she was secured by the team. 

Nineteen soldiers returned to the barracks after their showers. They sat in quiet reverence all too aware of the two empty beds in the room. Jack and Sam's cots had been removed shortly after they were terminated and it bothered them that Ash's cot still remained. Fallen soldiers were supposed to be forgotten. Zack glanced over at Jondy who occupied the cot next to him. Jondy was glairing at the stark white ceiling, stone still, arms crossed over her chest. She hadn't spoken a word since she'd made the accusations at Brin. Zack had transferred the rations they had for Max into his pillowcase before they had to report to the showers and trade in their fatigues for gowns. Now they were a hard lump under his peach fuzz covered head, a constant reminder of Max's absence. No one moved. No one talked. No one smiled.

Zack sat up his bare feet smacking against the cold hard floor, the sound almost deafening in the silence of the room. He stalked across the room and stood above Brin's bed.

"Explain yourself." He barked.

"I can't," Brin swallowed hard. "I have no explanation, sir. I was caught up in the thrill of the moment."

"Emotions." Zack shook his head and sighed, displaying a few of his own. "On your feet, soldier."

Brin jumped up off her bed and stood at attention ready for whatever task Zack had planned for her.

"Drop." Zack said simply. He set no limit, he set no time, Brin was just expected to follow the order. He wasn't even sure she deserved any more punishment and he knew he was coming down hard on her, but she'd broken the cardinal rule. Always protect the family above all else. That meant sometimes the needs of the younger ones just came before your own. Zack didn't know what else to do. 

So Brin started doing pushups as Zack turned on his heals and walked over to Jondy's bed. Zack caught Zane's eye as he passed his cot and cold tell he felt the same way. Unsure if the punishment fit the crime but at the same time thinking he was being too hard. 

"Jondy?" Zack asked softly as to not disturb the others who might have wanted to use these crucial seven hours for sleep. 

No response. Not a twitch, not a blink, nothing. It was like she was hurt by Max's absence and felt her pain. The two were closer then any of the others with Krit coming in a close second. Zack sometimes envied the closeness they had. Sometimes it seemed they were twins even though the scientists had used different DNA. They were almost the same person. The two shared a bond that the rest weren't even sure where it came from. Neither of them ever slept unless they were drugged or sick, they just didn't need to. Maybe it was their late night talks, those seven hours they had where no one but the two of them existed. Or maybe it was something else all together that made them close. No matter what it was when one was hurting the other hurt and when they were separated for long periods of time they were miserable. 

"Jondy?" Zack reached out and touched her shoulder and Jondy rolled out of range of his touch.

"You said she'd be okay. You promised big brother." Jondy's voice was small, hurt filled and angry. 

Zack winched inwardly. "She will be. Max is tough."

"That's not it. . ." Jondy was crying silent tears running down her face, which the others were becoming painfully aware of. The salty smell permeated the air in the room. Jondy was like Max in almost every way except she wasn't as emotional as her sister, her crying came as quite a shock.

Zack realized it all very suddenly. He sat at the foot of her cot placing a reassuring hand on the small of her back. "Max is coming back Jondy."

"What if she doesn't? What if they take her down to the basement and give her to the nomies? What if she really does have something wrong with her Zack? We can't loose two siblings in three days. . ." She turned to Zack with a strong conviction in her wide eyes.

A thud drew everyone's attention to Brin's cot or rather next to it. The girl's arms had finally given out on her, the lactic acid build up was too much and she was tired. Her body was shot, worn out. In a very soft yet clear and agony filled voice she declared. "I'm sorry."

Zack was on his feet and at her side in a heart beat. He knew he was being too hard on her, but he also knew he had to make this a lesson none of the others would forget. No one should ever break the first law again. He told her that her apology was all that was necessary along with the insurance that she would not do it again. He helped her into her cot and ordered her to get some rest. Brin agreed and promptly her breathing evened out, this was one order she would have no problem following. Zack returned to Jondy's bed to find Krit, Syl and Ben with her. Zack new he had good sibling. The others gathered around as Ben began to concoct a tale about an X-4 who had escaped the clutches of the nomies. A gallant soldier who had won his freedom, it was a good tale and helped put everyone's mind at ease. 


	6. Chapter 6

****

Max woke up to the far away sound of buzzing and panicked. It took precious minuets of fighting her bounds and trying to catch up with her racing mind before she realized that they were only shaving her head again. The buzz clipper was turned off than and someone went to work bic-ing her head down to bare skin with a hand held razor. A cold chill shot through her body as they applied the conductor jelly and then attached the electrodes to her head. One at each of her temples, two at the base of her skull, and six scattered around the perimeter of her head. She was strapped down to the table by her waist legs and arms and she could sense the presence of another person in the room besides the doctors. Max's body tensed and she began to panic, her eyes wide and filled with fear of what she knew was going to happen. 

As the first wave of shocks ran through her body the current made her body jolt. She screamed and heard someone gasp. Max put a name to the voice, Colonel Lydecker. She bit her bottom lip and held back a scream of pain as the second jolt of current ran along her spine. The movie started playing on the screen above her then. It told her she was good and that nothing was physically wrong with her. Positive reinforcement backed up by negative reinforcement. She struggled hard to concentrate on the movie and forget the training that told her pain was a weakness. When there was too much pain and too many questions they were supposed to forget everything but now wasn't one of those times. The movie was important. It told her that the memories she had of the incident had been a simple test for her, a tactic put into play. It was exposed for the lie that it was. The truth was drummed into her head the same way the original memories she had were. 

The truth set her mind at ease, the shocks reeking havoc on her nervous stem. Screams escaped her that she didn't even know she'd uttered. Cruel animalistic sounds that were not even in her own voice. They sounded strange even to her own ears. Then there were the cruel murmured sounds of approval coming from Colonel Lydecker. Eventually Max gave in to the pain screaming at the top of her lungs and overpowering the sound of mute laughter. After the long interval of thirty-five individual shock currents she finally passed out. Colonel Lydecker was very proud of Max's pain threshold. Max had handled fifteen more shocks at the same voltage that Zack had been able to handle at her age. He was very proud of her and certain that her previous conditioning towards the situation had been eradicated. Max would feel no more guilt about her involvement with Ashe's death. She'd know the truth, just how hard she had worked to try and save her brothers life. 

Zack winched and for once her didn't care who could see the weakness in him. Brin seemed to be the only one who could sleep as Max's agonizing screams filled the air. 

"How come we can hear it?" Jondy asked fear in her voice her hands over her ears. They could never hear when the others were tortured. 

"Colonel Lydecker must be amplifying it somehow. It must be a test for us." Zack sounded sure of himself, the informed and controlled commander. In reality he had no idea why. He felt horrible knowing there was nothing he could do for his younger sisters. 

Jondy broke down and cried again. Krit was at her side talking softly to her.

"Why can't they just leave us alone?" Jondy asked no one inparticular, not expecting any type of answer. Not even completely sure what being left alone was, except in the time she had with Max and sometimes Krit while everyone else was asleep. 

Ben tried telling them another story but he couldn't concentrate on constructing the tale over the sound of Max's screaming. Ben finally gave up on telling the story. He signaled to Zack that he was going to go up to the high place and pray to the Blue Lady to help Max. Zack shook his head no and signaled him that it wasn't safe to leave now. If he wanted to pray he should stay here and pray with the others. Ben had all the X-5's except Brin gather around his cot. Holding hands they silently prayed to the Blue Lady to help Max and return her safely to them. 

Shortly after they started to pray Max's screams subsided. They all relaxed a little thanking the Blue Lady for her help, but continued to pray for her safe return. About half an hour later two guards carried Max into the barracks on a stretcher and dumped her on to her cot. Once the door slammed shut behind the guards they all jumped out of their own cots which they had fled back to as soon as they had heard movement in the hallway. Jondy had brought their attention to it because she'd always had the best ears besides Max. 

Max didn't move from the position they had deposited her in she was as still as death. He body was bruised, wrists, ankles, knees and neck. Her head was shaved bare down to the skin. Her skin gave off the faint smell of something singed or burnt. He body convulsed freely much like the seizure that had taken Jake's life only it was different. Zack tried to wake Max to get her to eat. He struck her numerous times before he gave up on waking her. Max was too far-gone. Jondy was crying again, but this time it was out of pure joy over having Max back safely. Jondy crawled into bed with Max to keep her warm and safe and let her know she was there for her. Zack was glad to have Max back and be sure that they had not given her over to the nomies, but he kept his true feelings to himself. He had to be the one always in control. They were so relieved to have their little sister back that Ben started to tell another story. It was a happy tale that put everyone except himself, Zack and Jondy to sleep. Jondy and Zack kept vigil over Max all night, but Ben had fallen asleep just before he could finish his story. 


End file.
